The 1st short story to "My Interpretation: Short Stories Derived from Songs" is now up on Wattpad. Please read it, vote and leave comments. The short story is called "Dangerous Love" and is inspired by Ariana Grande's "Leave Me Lonely" featuring Macy Gray from her "Dangerous Woman" album.
It's a story I am very proud of and I mentioned before these stories are like music videos on paper but more in depth. They are what envision in my mind when listening to a song. Click the title below to read "Dangerous Love."
I was given this idea when I received an email from an author whose newsletter I am signed onto. Given, this post was supposed to be written on the 11th, I had a busy past 10 days dealing with work, lost luggage, planning for parties, and a Grandmother who was in the hospital. Whatever, it's here now!
Dear Teen Me,
It's okay to be different...like vastly different from your peers. I'm sorry I'm telling you this about 10 years too late but I didn't know it back then. You definitely should've dyed your hair the colors of the rainbow and embraced ripped up jeans and Converses instead of high heels and dark brown hair. You didn't have to change that because nothing was wrong with it.
It's okay to be into bands instead of rappers even though no one made you feel like it was (but I'm glad you met someone who did!). Liking rock music and being deemed as "emo" doesn't mean you abandoned your culture even though that's what they told you. I really digged the dark eyeliner and bright red hair...it was so...YOU!
No one had to understand you because you weren't meant to be understood. You were meant to be free and different. Your views matter and just because family and "friends" didn't share the same ones didn't make you wrong. You never had to fake what music you liked or the slang you couldn't speak. There's nothing wrong with saying "rad" or "awesome", it didn't make you any less black...it made you, you and you're pretty cool to me.
I only wish I told you this back then but I'm telling you now. Go ahead and be who you are. I love it. I finally love you.
24 Year Old You
Please leave comments, share, and like. Repost with a letter to your teen self or leave one in the comments below. What would you say to yourself if you knew back then what you know now?
Sign up for my newsletter via SElleCameron.com & receive a free kindle copy of my first novel, A Tragic Heart
It's been a while since I graced my blog with a short story based on my book series, The RED Tragedies series (aka A Tragic Heart Series), so I'm giving you a new one I actually wrote almost a month ago but never posted it. This one is from Ronan's POV, and if it was part of a book it would fit with RED (Book 2). It jumps into the future and shows Ronan as a grown man with a career and life of his own. Here's the link to the last short story: Peyton Hayley: No Need To Catch Me (I'm Not Falling)
Listen to "I Hope You Find It" by Miley Cyrus on repeat while reading:
It’s Always Her…
lying next to a girl I barely even know. I shot her a few times for the cover
of various popular magazines but that’s about it. Lately this has been my life.
Girls come and go because none of them can match my first love. She happened
eight years ago and she remains a friend but I can’t help but think that she’s
my true one.
ended when we were seventeen years old after a huge scandal broke loose that
she was sleeping with a famous rockstar, Alex Kinsley who was eight years her
senior. He got booted from his band and his career took a beating all before
she found him dead from a drug overdose in his multimillion dollar home. What
did she get out of it? A hot music career that looks like it won’t sink anytime
that we decided to pick up our friendship after Alex’s death, I became her go
to photographer. She uses me for everything from album covers, appearances to
magazine shootings; the only thing she won’t use me for is love. Even after all
the wrong she’s done and the pain she’s caused me, inside I still love her.
That will never change but for some reason I fight the feeling.
are you thinking about?” Adriana asks as she runs her fingers through my hair.
She’s the model I photographed today for the next issue of Vogue. I invited her
out for drinks and the rest you can come up with yourself.
really. Just how beautiful those photos came out. You’re gorgeous,” I lie
rolling onto my side and kissing her neck. She laughs and buys into the lie I
just told. I couldn’t tell her that I was really thinking about my ex from high
school who I still hang with every once in a while.
come a nice and hot guy like you don’t have a steady girlfriend? What’s wrong
with you, huh?” she asks playfully. “Are you really a serial killer or
that’s totally it,” I reply with a smile. “Seriously, though, I have no idea. I
guess I just haven’t met the right girl.”
is I have met the right girl, our happiness is just stuck in the past somewhere
frozen in time. I remember when she asked for me back after Alex died and her
life was getting back together. I declined and told her I could never go there
with her again. Now I’m not so sure if that was the right decision.
remained good friends and talk about anything we feel the need to. I’ve witness
a few guys come and go out of her life and she had a share of heartbreaks after
Alex but it was nothing she couldn’t handle. Truth is I’m not so sure she ever
got over me either. The good news is she’s more stable than she was when we got
was a broken a girl. She had no parents and was raised by her dad’s closest
cousin, his wife and her uncle. Her father died in a car accident when he was
only 17 and her mom commit suicide shortly after because of it. Basically, she
never had a fair chance. When we got together I thought I’d be the one to fix
her and I did for a while…but I wasn’t enough. Peyton always aimed for
something a little more risky.
took everything from me. My virginity, my heart, my ability to love another;
it’s all gone because of her.
going to jump in the shower for a while…you’re welcomed to join me,” Adriana
says with a smirk before climbing out of bed.
told her I’m okay for now as she closed the bathroom door behind her. I picked
up my phone from the night stand next to me and saw I had a new text message.
“I have this
really cool idea for a photoshoot. Call me so we can talk about it.”
of the devil. Of course I would call her. In fact, I couldn’t wait to hear her
voice. I replied to her text saying, “Busy right now but I’ll contact you
later. Maybe we can talk about it over dinner?”
some reason I felt nervous, sort of like I was asking her out on a date. She
immediately texts me back telling me that dinner is okay and tomorrow night
would be good for her. I smile to myself and put my phone down. I can’t wait to
see her again. It’s been months since we’ve last spoke in person.
out of bed and decide to join Adriana in the shower. It wouldn’t be a good idea
to be hung up on Peyton for the rest of the night when I had a beautiful model
in my shower. Before I head in the bathroom I hear my phone go off again like I
had another message. I double back and check it only to see a message from
to see you. Feels like it’s been ages. Maybe we can hang a little more this
week since I’m in town for a while…you know, just us old friends and a lot of
It's been a little over a week but I got another short story for you all! This one is from Jackson's POV and if it belonged to a book it would belong to RED (Book 2). It goes into detail on why Jackson is no longer married and readers can see just how much he was able to relate to Mason's situation in RED as well. Hope you enjoy!
Listen to "Wings" by Birdy on repeat while reading:
entire flight I could only think about getting home to my wife and two
children. It’s been two months since I last seen them; the longest I ever went.
The moment I touched down I couldn’t help but smile to myself. The flight was
already delayed because of the rain. My driver was waiting for me to arrive.
Immediately, I grabbed my bag and got in the car.
going to be so surprised to see me home early. She expected me to come home
next week but it was a lie I told her and the kids to surprise them. They’ve
missed me so much and it breaks my heart every time my baby girl cries over a
video chat begging me to come home to her. She’s only five so she doesn’t fully
understand why daddy isn’t home every day the way other fathers are. My son
takes it much better but lately he’s been getting into trouble at school. It’s
time for me to put my career on hold and focus on my home life.
we pull up to my estate I give Martin, my driver a huge tip. It’s the middle of
the night and he has a family he should get home to also so it’s the least I
can do. He tells me to take care and I reply for him to do the same. As he
pulls off I quietly unlock the door and push it open. I set my bag down at the
entrance because I want free hands when Megan jumps into my arms. I plan on
asking no questions and just taking her right there. We don’t get a lot of time
together but I love my wife just as much as a man who sees his every day…distance
doesn’t change a thing for me.
silently rush up the stairs and head straight to our bedroom. The light is on
which means she’s still up. I find it strange because she’s usually so
exhausted from the kids she’s out by ten the latest. It only makes me more
excited knowing that she’s wide awake…maybe we can spend a couple more hours
together before we both crash.
turn the knob and push open the door only to be stopped dead in my tracks. She
was surprised alright…they both were. Initially, I don’t know how to react, I
watch as she scrambles to put her clothes on. I keep thinking, ‘this is the wife I couldn’t wait to come
home to’. It takes a while before I can even get angry. I just feel hurt…all
Oh my God!I can- I can explain,” she
says trying to put her clothes on. “You weren’t supposed to be home yet.”
says it like that’s supposed to make a difference. Like it makes it okay that I
found her in bed with another man. If she knew I was coming, he wouldn’t be
here…but that means whenever I’m not around he’s with her. My mind is trying to
make sense of what’s in front of me. I don’t answer. I turn away and walk out.
down the stairs unsure of what I’m going to do next. I almost walk out of the
front door until I realize this is my house. Everything that’s here is because
of me. I lean against the door with a blank expression. That’s when he comes
running down the stairs and stops when he sees me.
you know?” I ask calmly.
what?” he asks in a nervous tone.
she was married…did you know that she had a husband?” I reiterate.
didn’t know that you were her husband…she
just said-“ I cut him off with a blow to the face.
gives a fuck if you knew I was her
husband or not?! You knew she was a married woman you sorry son of a bitch!” I
yell as I give him hit after hit.
rushes down the stairs at full speed pushing me off him. He gets up and walks
out as fast as he can.
listen to me! I’m so sorry! You have to let me explain!” she says frantically
while holding onto me.
push her away from me and walk back up the stairs. She follows me while begging
and pleading but nothing changes for me. I still have the same look on my face,
my body language is all the same.
make my way to our bedroom and open the door to her walk in closet. I grab a
bunch of her clothes not caring if I’m picking up complete outfits or not.
what are you doing?! What are you doing with my stuff?!” she yells with tears
streaming down her face. It almost makes me feel sorry for her looking at her
brown eyes grow darker.
you out tonight. You can’t stay here,” I say as calmly as I know how.
walking down the stairs and to the front door. She’s only inches behind me.
No, can we talk about this? Give it some time!” she begs.
long has this been happening?” I ask not really caring what her answer would
be. My decision will remain the same.
a year…but you don’t understand you were never here!”
laugh a little. “Well that justifies it,” I say sarcastically. “I gave you
everything! The car you drive, the house you live in…our kids! I did all of
that you ungrateful slut!”
shutters at the harshness of my words. I can tell it took her by surprise.
are the kids?” I ask.
takes a deep breath so she can speak clearly. She’s still crying nonstop. “In
their rooms. I swear they never saw him…they don’t know anything.”
want you out of my house Megan.” I open the door and throw her clothes out into
the pouring rain.
please don’t…I love you!”
Megan, love is when you come home early to surprise your wife and kids not when
you sleep with another man because your husband is out making a living for his
family,” I reply.
her by her arms and push her towards the door. She’s only wearing a pair of
short and a large t-shirt. She doesn’t even have shoes on.
no! No!” she begs. “I have nowhere to go.”
pull out my wallet and take out a couple of hundred dollar bills. “I’m sure you
can find a decent hotel for the night with that.”
“What about the kids?” she asks
trying to pull my grip off of her arm.
“I’ll tell them that mommy is a
cheating whore who had to go away for a while. Don’t worry, I won’t keep you
away from your kids but you can’t stay here!” I forcefully push her out the
door. She lands on her knees, I’m sure causing them to scrape. I don’t even
care enough to care. I slam the door and lock it. I leave her out there without
a cell phone, keys, or a jacket. I’m that angry.
I walk away from the door while
hearing her bang over and over. She’s crying and begging but I don’t care. I
spend some time in the guest room before I think about my actions. After about
thirty minutes of her standing out in the rain without any decent clothes, I
let her back in. She’s sobbing and shivering.
“You stay in the bedroom and I’ll be
in one of the other rooms. You can have the house and we’ll split custody. You’ll
have them majority of the time since I’m always on tour or working on an album.
They’re my family and I will put them first but you’re nothing to me. You never
will mean anything to me ever again,” I say.
“Jack, you’re just hurt,” she
replies as her voice cracks. She tries to touch me but I move her away.
“No, I mean it. This is it for us. I
don’t want to fight you for anything. I just want out. It hurt me to be away
from you too but I never touched another woman. I’m done here.”
I leave her standing there dripping
from the rain. She’ll probably cry the entire night but I don’t care. This is
the beginning of the end for us…
Find out more about Jackson in the RED Tragedies Series here. Jackson appears in A Tragic Heart, RED, & What Could've Been.
Last week I posted a short story from Mason's POV and this week's story takes off from that one but it's from Adalyn's POV. You can read last week's here (Mason: The Brother's Club) to catch up. This scene is strictly between Adalyn and Peyton and if it belonged to a book it would be part of Turn It Off (Book 3). Hope you enjoy!
Listen to "At Least My Heart Was Open" by Foy Vance on repeat while reading:
he stood right in front of me. All six foot two of him, his green eyes staring
at me; those same eyes I fell in love with…those same eyes that convinced me to
give it all to him. We were in the back of the barely lit bar our band plays in
from time to time. We just finished a show and the rest of our crew already
left to go home. It was just me, Peyton and the bar employees.
went well,” he said taking a seat next to me.
could barely look at him; not after what I did…not after what our breakup did
to him. Mason told me he ended up in a hospital bed getting his stomach pumped
from alcohol poisoning. He almost drank himself to death because he was so
depressed. He wouldn’t take it well if he knew what happened between me and his
cousin last week.
it did,” I replied looking down at my drink. I circled my finger around the rim
of the glass. Anything not to look at him.
still love him…I always will and part of me wants him back but I’m not sure how
smoothly that would work out.
told me you came by last week looking for me. I got a little caught up and never
got the chance to stop by,” he said positioning himself to look directly at me.
could tell he knew something was bothering me. I hoped he didn’t ask.
I did. I wanted to talk to you about us…I just wanted to make sure we didn’t
lose our friendship,” I took a sip of my drink. “We’ve been best friends and
bandmates for too long to let our relationship fuck all that up. I just wanted
you to know that I will always love you Peyton and I don’t want us to not be us anymore.”
feel the same way,” he said as he placed his hand over mine. “I’m glad we’re on
the same page. Adalyn, I really wanted us to work. I’m madly in love with you
and…I’m sorry. I was a jerk…an asshole.”
that very moment I wanted to kiss him. I wanted to forget all this talk about
friendship and grab him right there. I gulped down my drink quickly to avoid
wanted was to tell him I was sorry and explain to him that Mason was a mistake.
I didn’t mean to sleep with his cousin that day. It just happened. After
spending the day with him, I felt a short connection with him and Peyton just
never showed up. I was vulnerable and Mason looked good with his wet hair
slicked back and his shirt off. I never thought the second guy I would lay with
would be my ex-boyfriend’s cousin. They’re like brothers and this would devastate
Peyton. Mason and I vowed to keep it a secret. Besides, no one needs to know.
It’s not like it would happen again anyway.
are we going to go back to being just friends if we’re still this much in love?”
he asked grabbing hold of his beer bottle in front of him.
just have to deal with it. We did the best we could as lovers and it didn’t
work. We always worked as friends though. It’ll be hard but we’ll be okay,” I
answered finally looking up at him. He really is a handsome boy…red hair and
all; in fact it only makes him more attractive.
we go back to being just friends can I kiss you one last time?” he asked moving
in a bar with people around,” I objected.
one’s paying any attention to us. I just want one last kiss and that’ll be it,”
he continued to press the issue.
had a point. The lights were dim and the bar crew was cleaning up. I leaned in
and lightly grabbed him by his collar. He smirked a little before I pressed my
lips against his. He pulled me closer and groaned a little. I wanted more…I
wanted to take it back and say let’s try one more time but I thought about what
happened with Mason last week and all of my thoughts were shattered. If I got
back with Peyton I would have to tell him. I fucked up any chance of there
being an “us” ever again. If he knew, he would never look at me the same. He
would call me a name or two and stop speaking to his cousin. Peyton’s temper
isn’t made for the truth.
pull back and he tries to kiss me again but I turn my face away from him. I can’t
do it another time. Once was enough.
on Addy…let’s just go back to my place and work this out,” he softly pleads. “I
love you and you love me. Let’s not make this harder than it needs to be. I’ll
be better this time. I’ll put a cap on my rage and I’ll be more respectful of
no.” My eyes are teary and my face is turning red. “Trust me, you don’t want
me. I’m not the same me anymore. We
won’t be the same.”
caressed my arm and bit his bottom lip. He didn’t hear a word I just said.
All he thought about was taking me back to his place and “making up”.
I raised my voice a little and smacked his hand away. He jumped back into
reality. “No! I’m just going to go home now. I’ll talk to you later.” I got up
and walked toward the door at the back of the bar. I took one last look at him
before walking out. He focused his eyes on mine and I saw the anger inside of
him. I walked out knowing he found some other girl to take my place that night.
sit in my room looking at the picture we took together as a couple. I want so
badly to call him and tell him I take it back but I’m sure he’s too busy with
Claire or Lauren or whoever was willing…I let a tear fall and lay in my bed. At
least I sort of did the right thing…at least we’re still friends…
Find out more about Adalyn and Peyton in the RED Tragedies series here. Adalyn appears in A Tragic Heart, RED, Turn It Off (Coming Soon) & What Could've Been (Coming Soon). Peyton appears in A Tragic Heart, Turn It Off, & What Could've Been.
New week, new short story! You can check out last week's right here (Taylor: The Greatest Liar). This week the story comes from Mason's point of view and if it fit a book it would be Turn It Off (Book 3 of the series). We know a little about this scene from A Tragic Heart (Book 1) when Mason confessed something to Peyton but it was never played out. Well, now it is! The story is entitled "The Brothers Club" and I hope you enjoy! It's a tad bit longer than the previous two.
Listen to "Ink" by Coldplay on repeat while reading:
doorbell rang for a second time before I decided to hop off the couch and
answer it. My mom and dad are gone and Peyton is God knows where. Ever since he
and Adalyn broke up, he’s been going down that slippery slope again. I’m a
little afraid for him to be honest.
coming!” I yell towards the door as I make it down the hallway.
open it to see Adalyn standing in front of me. Obviously, she’s here for
Peyton. Lately, all these two do is yell at each other and then make up. I
never thought it would be like that for them. She’s so good for him and they
were happy for about a year straight. I thought she would be the girl to set
him straight and keep him that way. I guess it’s true, we can’t change people.
All I know is, he’s a fool! Adalyn is the closest thing to perfection we’ll get
in this world. As she stands in front of me, she looks like a model who was
snatched right out of a Maxim magazine cover.
hey, Adalyn! What’s going on?” I ask standing in the doorway.
Mason, is Peyton home?” she asks looking past me and into the house.
slowly moves her blonde hair away from her face. I never realized how bright
her eyes are…they’re the perfect honey brown.
no, he’s not. He left not too long ago. I have no idea where he went and how
long he’ll be.”
she replies in a disappointed tone. “I just wanted to talk to him about what
happened the other night.”
mean, about you two breaking up?” I ask raising one eyebrow.
bites her bottom lip pretty hard before responding. “Uh, yeah. Of course he
told you,” she says nonchalantly. “He tells you everything.”
you’re welcomed to come in and wait for him if you’d like. He may be back in a
little while,” I proposed.
around for a few seconds before answering. “Okay, it’s not like I have anything
better to do anyway.”
move to the side to let her in and she moves past me swiftly. She stops in the
family room and turns to me.
Breakfast Club?!” she says with a wide smile. “That’s what you’re watching?!”
yeah…” I reply a little embarrassed. “There was nothing else on and-“
awesome! This is my favorite movie!”
sits in the very same spot I was in just before I answered the door. Looks like
I’m stuck watching The Breakfast Club with Adalyn. I admit I’m a fan of the
movie too. I’m sure there was more to choose from but what can I say? I like a
good 80’s movie.
time speeds by and the end of the movie comes faster than I remember; yet there’s
still no sign of Peyton. In a way, I enjoy him not being here. Spending time
with Adalyn isn’t so bad. It’s actually a first for me. Every time she’s around
Peyton’s with her. I never got a chance to get to know her.
uh, so you want a beer or something while you wait for Peyton or do you have to
go?” I ask a little more nervously than I should have.
beer sounds not so bad right about now. Like I said, I have nothing to do,” she
answers with a smirk.
head to the kitchen and take two of my dad’s beers out of the refrigerator. I
come back and hand it to her.
she says as she takes it from my hand. “You know, it’s a pretty nice night.
Want to go out back and hang for a while?”
That sounds cool.”
lead the way and she follows along. Before I know it we’re both drinking and
talking. She tells me about why she decided to break up with Peyton and how she’s
honestly just worried about him and his state of mind.
he seemed really off lately? Should I be worried?” she asks as if she truly
cares about him. I can see how much she loves him. He started off as her best
friend and bandmate and then became so much more. Peyton was her first for
I pause for a few seconds. “He’s been drinking…a lot.”
God!” she says as her eyes widen. “Has he-“
I don’t think so,” I answer before she can even ask the question. She’s worried
he started using the hard stuff again. Peyton just got out of rehab last summer
and we’re all a little afraid he’ll end up much worse if he goes back down that
keep an eye on him. I know he probably won’t let me get that close to him for a
while,” she says moving her curly blonde hair behind her ear.
as she finishes her sentence, the sprinklers pop up and starts to spray us
both. It’s unexpected and hilarious. We both squirm and fight to not get wet
but it’s useless; we’re drenched by the time we make it back into the house.
laughing as I close the back door. Her hair is sticking to her face and I slick
uh, you can’t go home like that. Come upstairs and let me give you a shirt at
least,” I say with a smile.
follows me up the stairs and into my room. I pick out something that I know
wouldn’t look too big on her.
you,” she says as I hand it to her.
walk out the room only to double back when I realize I probably should have
offered her a pair of my basketball shorts to go with it. I open the door
without knocking only to see her in her bra.
uh, I’m really sorry, I uh-“I begin to say.
laughs a little and tells me it’s okay. “I’m in a bra, not naked,” she laughs.
I say awkwardly. “Uh, well since you don’t mind I was just coming in to offer
you a pair of shorts.”
Mason, a pair of shorts would be great,” she says still in her laced pink bra.
stare at her longer than I should. She starts to unbutton her pants but I don’t
even think to leave.
“This is the part where
you should probably walk out,” she jokes, “unless you don’t want to…”
I know it was meant as a
joke but some part of me took it as a proposition.
“What if I don’t want to?”
I ask not taking my eyes off of her.
Her face turns serious
and we both stand there staring at each other. I make the first move and walk
closer. She doesn’t move so I get as close as I can. I touch her wet hair and
she looks up at me.
“Mason…” she says softly
while looking into my eyes.
“I know…this is wrong but…”
I can’t even finish my sentence.
I move my face towards
hers and kiss her lightly. She kisses me back letting me know she was one
hundred percent with it. I place one hand on the side of her face and she
continues to kiss me. She places her hand over mine and kisses me harder.
Peyton’s like my brother
so everything about this is wrong but I can’t stop myself. Adalyn’s too
beautiful not to touch. I pull back from the kiss to take off my shirt. She
looks at me and sits on my bed; her jeans already unbuttoned. Is this really
going to happen? She’s no longer with Peyton but that doesn’t make it okay. He’s
still in love with her and she’s in love with him. He’s the only guy she’s ever
been with in that way; but most of
all, he’s my cousin.
None of these thoughts
stop me. I go for it and before I know it, Adalyn and I are fully at it. For me
it’s mostly lust, for her…well I can’t say. She’s a great girl and I think I
could really like her if it ever came to it but more than likely that’s not
going to happen. It was just the heat of the moment.
When we finish she
scrambles to find her clothes. Wet or not, she was in a hurry to go and I’m
sure the last thing she wanted to wear was something that reminds her of me and
what just happened.
“I won’t tell Peyton,” I
say after we’re fully dressed. “He doesn’t have to know.”
“I think that’s best,”
she says barely looking at me.
“I’ll let him know you
stopped by,” I say before she walks out my room.
“Yeah, thanks,” she replies
as she hurries out.
Well, so much for being
one half of the brothers club…
Find out more about Mason and Adalyn in the RED Tragedies series here! Mason and Adalyn appears in A Tragic Heart, RED, Turn It Off (Coming Soon), and What Could've Been (Coming Soon)
Last week I posted my first short story based on the characters from my book series (RED Tragedies Series or A Tragic Heart Series, whatever you want to call it) and here I am this week with a new one. You can view the one from last week here (Peyton: The One) before reading this one if you want. As I stated in my initial post about the short stories they will be posted in no particular order and can fit any book.
This week the story comes from Taylor's point of view and if it belonged to a book it would belong to A Tragic Heart (Book 1 of the series). It's entitled "The Greatest Liar" and would fit perfectly with the triangle that happens between Taylor, Mason, and Peyton. Enjoy!
Listen to "The Greatest Bastard" by Damien Rice while reading:
I wonder if we’re really in control of our decisions or if fate forces us to do
what we do. Either way we have to pay the consequences. I guess life is unfair
that way. I let one single tear fall before opening the door to our apartment.
This used to be the only place that put a smile on my face after a hard day and
now I can’t even call it my safe haven. It’s been built upon lies.
fake a smile towards the once “love of my life”. He really did keep his promise
about trying to be a better man for me even after the infidelity and the whole
getting another girl pregnant thing. The problem is that I just couldn’t
forgive him as easily as I thought I could. It hurts all the time, just the
smiles back at me and pulls me into a hug as he kisses me softly on the cheek.
He was lying across the couch watching a game he probably didn’t even care
about. It was just something to pass the time until I came home.
told him I had something to take care of with Jackson since he came back to
town. I told him he only had a week here and I wanted to spend time with my
brother. It was a lie…all of it. Jackson is really in town but I wasn’t
spending time with him…I was with Peyton. Mason knows Peyton and I are best
friends but he would even find it weird that I chose to spend the entire night
with him on a day we had a date planned. Truth is I would rather spend my time
with Peyton at his place than go out into the real world with Mason. The
biggest problem about that is Mason’s my husband and Peyton’s his closest
cousin. Guilt consumes me once more.
my love?” Mason asks with a grin. He’s been extraordinarily welcoming lately.
good,” I lie.
was thinking since you canceled our date maybe we could pull an all-nighter and
watch a few movies over junk food. I bought your favorite cheesecake from your
flashes me his puppy dog eyes and I can’t decline that. He’s really trying.
He’s really sorry. I wish I could say the same about myself.
love that, Mason,” I reply in a soft voice. “Just let me take a quick shower
walk past him hoping he doesn’t ask why I need a shower. Honestly, I feel dirty
after spending the night loving Peyton just to come home and fake it with his
cousin. Mason and I had a good run but it’s over…I just can’t fully let him go.
I’m doing to him what he did to me first but I think I’m the greatest liar in
I’m going to tell him; I’m just trying to figure out how and when. This is
going to crush him more than it crushed me. At least Lauren wasn’t a friend or
a family member. Peyton is practically his brother. They were raised together
and even grew up in the same household. They took on the world together since
forever and here I am breaking up one of the greatest bonds that ever existed.
The stories of Mason and Peyton are legendary…but this one is going to go down
as the most iconic.
I strip off my clothes
and turn on the shower. The moment the warm water hits my face I let the tears
fall. How could Mason cheat on me for so long without it affecting him like
this? It’s only been about two weeks since Peyton and I started this affair and
I feel like I’m already breaking.
I tried to justify my
actions by remembering that I probably was always in love with Peyton from the
start and just didn’t realize it. Peyton recently told me he was in love with
me from the first time we ever spoke to each other. He saw me around from time
to time and always thought I was his type of girl, he just never acted and
Mason got there first. I thought Mason was all I ever wanted but once I got to
know Peyton, I saw just how wrong I was. It was fate.
That’s exactly what I
want to tell Mason when I break him the news. I want to tell him that it was
fate that brought Peyton and I together. Our bad decisions weren’t ours at all
but it was something in this cosmic universe that conspired to put us together
before time even started. We’re soulmates and as foolish as it sounds it must
be true because we both felt the attraction the moment we stood in front of
each other. Peyton wasn’t just meant to be my best friend…he was always more.
I’m his extra rib and Mason…Mason is the pawn that was played to bring us
together. Maybe if I explained it this way Mason would understand and wouldn’t be
as hurt; but even I know that’s not true.
I turn off the shower
water and step out. I wipe off the foggy mirror in the bathroom to take a good
look at myself. I still look intact and Mason wouldn’t suspect a thing. I hurry
and head straight to our bedroom to get dressed. I throw on one of Mason’s
t-shirts and walk back into the living room. He bites his bottom lip as I sit
next to him.
“I always liked that
shirt on you,” he says coming closer.
“I know, that’s why I
wore it,” I reply as I forced him to cuddle with me.
His skin is always so
warm and something about that makes me feel like everything is going to be
okay. Part of me wants Mason forever but I know I have to make a choice…or
maybe the universe has already done that for me. In the end, I don’t think the
choice is really mine at all. I was made for Peyton and Peyton was made for me;
but for the time being I’ll just enjoy the movie and cheesecake with Mason.
Find out more about Mason and Taylor in the RED Tragedies series here! Mason appears in A Tragic Heart, RED, Turn It Off (Coming Soon), and What Could've Been (Coming Soon). Taylor appears in A Tragic Heart, Turn It Off and What Could've Been.
The short story is entitled, "The One" and takes off from the part in A Tragic Heart where he and Taylor comes back from their vacation with Mason in Australia. If "The One" belonged to a book it would fit right in with What Could've Been. It's an excerpt based on Peyton not going for a ride that night in A Tragic Heart. Enjoy!
hard to believe in just a few short days I’ll be leaving her just to follow my
dreams. It feels a little selfish but I know she wouldn’t want it any other
way. A few years ago I wouldn’t have dreamed of deciding to live my dream or
staying home for a girl…I never thought I would be so tempted to choose the
my fingers through her black hair as her head is on my lap. She fell asleep on
the couch while we cuddled watching TV. It’s nothing new. She does this all the
time; suggests we should watch something but falls asleep not even thirty
minutes in. The thought puts a smile on my face.
just got in from our trip to Australia with Mason and we’re both a little jet
lagged. I’m surprised she was able to fall asleep so easily. During most of the
trip I was a little bothered thinking about how I would have to leave her
almost as soon as we get back from our trip. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed
myself with her and my cousin, it’s exactly what I needed but it was
bittersweet knowing that everything finally fell into place when I have to
thought about going for drive to clear my head but decided to stay right here
with her. Usually a drive out on the town would help but I thought why leave
her when I have to be out of here in a few days anyway. Besides, it’s pouring
out there and that may not be a wise decision. I want to savor every moment
with her…even if it means watching her sleep.
how two years ago I was a kid running wild and now here I am, engaged and ready
to start a family with the most amazing girl I’ve ever met. I’m only seventeen
and four months shy of my eighteenth birthday but I feel like I’ve aged at
least a decade since then.
leaned over to kiss her softly on the side of her face. She moves around a
little before finally waking up. She sits up and yawns with a stretch. God, she’s
so adorable! I admire every second of this moment.
what happened? You were watching it without me!” she whines as she looks back
and forth from the TV and me.
smirk at her and shake my head a little. I knew this part was coming. She falls
asleep and then blames me for still watching the show.
I was watching you,” I correct her.
that’s not creepy at all,” she replies sarcastically.
you’d rather me watch the movie without you?” I raise one eye brow and stare at
Shut up and kiss me.”
love when she demands me to do something. She can be so feisty at times and I must
admit I love it. I submitted to her and did as I was told. She always demands
me to kiss her when she knows she’s lost a debate.
can’t wait to marry you,” I whisper to her before she kisses me again.
can I,” she replies after biting her bottom lip. She knows what that does to
start to caress her arm and she knows what’s coming next. I can’t keep my hands
or eyes off of her. Every day is almost like I’m just seeing her for the first
you tired?” she asks with her head slightly tilted to the side.
tired enough,” I say staring into her beautiful green eyes.
pull her into me and kiss her a little rougher this time. She doesn’t interrupt
and goes along with it. I grab the sides of her face and lightly run my fingers
through her hair. She does the same to me, letting me know we’re on the same
her on the couch and she bites her bottom lip and lets out a small laugh. She
excites me in the most non-sexual way possible. I genuinely love her and adore
every little thing about her. I can’t imagine this any other way.
slowly lean myself on top of her just to stare into her eyes. I have to
reposition myself because my side is still sore from the stab wound Karson gave
me. She notices it and lightly touches my side.
okay. We don’t have to,” she says with a serious look.
no, I’m fine. I’m good,” I assure her. I kiss her once more and I feel her hand
touch the back of my neck. It gives me chills in the best way. “I hate that I
have to leave you so soon.” I stare at her waiting for a reply.
be okay. We’ll be okay. Go follow your dreams and have the time of your life
with your band. I’ll be right here waiting for you when you get back.” She
smiles at me and I can’t help but smirk back.
is why I love you so much,” I respond kissing her on the cheek.
can’t even begin to mention the reasons why I love you,” she says.
kiss again but this time it lasts for much longer. She knows how to make me
feel good about any situation. That’s when you know you’ve met the one. I can’t
wait to leave so I can come back home to my baby.
Find out more about Peyton and Taylor in the RED Tragedies series here! They appear in A Tragic Heart, Turn It Off (Coming Soon), and What Could've Been (Coming Soon)!
Sorry I went away for a while without a word but a lot of new things happened to me so my schedule has been unusual and it took time to get used to it all. I haven't forgot about my duties as a writer and from now on I intend to keep up with my true career.
Actually, in a way I have been keeping up with my writing career, just not through social media and the internet. For starters, I have a new logo and slogan that I posted below. I thought the tagline, "All love is a tragedy!" is very fitting for my novels/work. I believe even the greatest love is a tragedy because we leave ourselves wide open while firearms are pointing in our direction and we don't care if they're ready to shoot...all in the name of love! So yeah, that's where that came from...
Anyway, on to something a tad bit more important than my tagline and new logo...my book shower! All is welcome, the more the merrier! It's all going to happen on June 20th from 2-5pm at 281 Babylon Turnpike, Roosevelt, NY 11575. It's something you really don't want to miss so if you can find a way to make it then do so!
There will be food...TONS OF FOOD (which includes desserts and hors d'oeuvres), games, prizes, surprises, and of course books for sale just waiting to be signed by me! I will update you all as time goes by but it is also important to RSVP (it's free unless you want a special package) since I plan to have assigned seating. Each table will be named after a character from my books so you never know whose table you'll be sitting at and what surprise that character has in store for you!
This is something that I talk about often with my boyfriend and pretty much anyone who gets on the subject with me. It's about readers and reviews. For authors, leaving a review is crucial. It's almost like the biggest deal ever for us. We rely on customer reviews to help us sell books and get our name out there. Reviews are awesome but they can also be very cruel.
I noticed on Goodreads and Amazon that people leave an alarming number of one star reviews for novels. The funny thing about it is those books average a four to five star rating from most readers but a surprising number always gives one star. Now, everyone is entitled to their own opinion and if by any means you believe the book deserves one star then rate it; however, think about the context you're rating around.
I find it troubling when I see a book that has an average of 4.5 out of 5 stars receive a 1 star rating based on a small subject within the book. For example, I've seen someone give a certain book a 1 star rating on Goodreads because she claimed a character slut-shamed another. Even if this is so, I feel it's unfair (and brutal) to slam an entire book and label it misogynistic over one character.
When writers create a story they make their characters both likeable and dislikeable. It's realistic. Also, another thing to keep in mind, just because a writer writes something, doesn't mean they feel that way personally. We make up things we would never say or do all the time. Not all characters are meant to be likeable so if you become frustrated or angry, it's a sign the author did their job right.
Things to think about when reviewing a book are:
1. Was it well written? 2. Was the story interesting or not? 3. Did the story flow well? 4. Were the characters believable? (Regardless if you liked them or not) 5. Did the book make you feel any set of emotions?
It's okay to write in a review that you hated a character and wanted them to die (trust me we all feel that way) but if that's how the author wanted you to feel then they did their job well. I've seen people give a book 1 or 2 stars because a situation made them angry. It's a situation that would make anyone who's human angry, therefore if you felt anger while reading it, that author got their point across. It's almost like giving the movie P.S. I Love You a bad review because it made you cry at the end. That's the point of the movie...it's a tearjerker!
Now, thankfully this hasn't happened to me yet (knock on wood) but I'm sure it will sometime in the future. So, readers before you review any work by any author keep the questions above in the back of your mind. Does a book really deserve a bad review because it made you cry or angry? Does it deserve a bad review because a character frustrated you with their choices?
It's okay if a book wasn't for you (and it's more than okay to put that in a review) but don't try and discourage other people from buying/reading that book. Everyone likes something different. It's cruel to an author if a reader rates their work 1 star over something that didn't represent the plot of the book overall. There's a lot of time, editing, and frustration that goes into place when writing a book. On top of that, there's a mixture of fear and excitement to release the book to the public. People are going to tear us apart regardless but think before you become one of those people. If you feel the book wasn't well written, the story sucked, it didn't flow, the characters weren't believable or realistic, and you felt nothing at all while reading it, then by all means give it 1 star and maybe even give the author a few tips for his/her next book; but if all of these factors were pretty much there and you didn't like one character or one situation, then be a little more considerate. Readers, we depend on you.
As most of the world, I've been listening to Taylor Swift's new album, 1989 for the past week and I've chosen a favorite song, Clean. The lyrics itself are cutting and the music just makes it straight mesmerizing. I know she's talking about getting clean from the mess of a past relationship but I couldn't help but compare it to life and past disappointments. The only issue is that I'm not even close to getting clean but I would like to.
The lyrics, "Rain came pouring down/When I was drowning that's when I could finally breathe." I feel like I need to drown so I can learn to breathe again. That's when I start to wonder how many other people actually feel that way too. Life has a way of stealing your dreams, doesn't it?
Suffering rejection after rejection and loss after loss, you start t lose it all and feel lost yourself. It's like a punch in the chest every time I hear Taylor sing, "Hung my head as I lost the war/And the sky turned black like a perfect storm." I just love the way her voice cracks towards the end of her statement. Speaking of getting punched in the chest, the other stand out line in this track is, "The water filled my lungs/I screamed so loud but no one heard a thing." I can't even remember all the times that happened within the past few months.
You know that feeling when it seems like you have no more options left and you're unsure what else to do because everything you've ever learned or know no longer works with your current situation? You would give almost anything for a fresh start and to learn how to do it all again but the only problem is you don't know where to start or how. One thing I definitely agree with Taylor on is when she says, "The drought was the very worst." Yes, it is.
She follows that line with, "...When the flowers that we'd grown together died of thirst." Again, this is meant to be aimed towards a failed relationship but how many of you feel like you've spent so much time growing flowers, better yet an entire garden only to see it all die of thirst before your eyes? I think I'll be the first one to raise my hand for that one.
The song has a sad and hopeless feel to it yet there's a sound of freedom that comes through strong. It's a song about broken freedom yet being completely whole in your brokenness. Maybe that's what true freedom looks like: a little broken, a little hopeful, and a tad bit hopeless yet everything is perfectly fine. I'm guessing Taylor didn't actually mean that she could finally breathe while she was drowning but she woke up and realized things she never noticed before. Maybe drowning can be a good thing after all.
Most people have the belief that you have to be in the mood to write. I used to be one of those people (and on some days I still am). In fact, I skipped over my fifth novel to complete my sixth all because of the mood I was in. Now that I'm finished with the sixth, I'm back at working on number five. I was always one to complete one project before moving to another but the mood I was in compelled me to write a fourth and final book to my series, starting with A Tragic Heart.
I've been given the advice to write even when I'm not in the mood to and so far it's been great advice. I've actually written some of the best scenes during moments I simply didn't feel like writing. It always starts off hard but if you just sit there and think for a while, the writer's block will go away.
Now, I do agree that it feels better to write or create something when those creative juices are already flowing. It's easier to get the words out when the wheels are already cranking and turning. Sometimes, it just can't be that way but as writers we should learn to write even when we don't want to...because the truth is we need to. We need to be able to write under any circumstances if we want to be able to call ourselves writers and authors. We're artists and being an artists is much more than being in a mood. It's who we are!
A great example of this is Foster The People's hit song "Pumped Up Kicks". The lead singer and writer of the band stated that he wasn't in the mood to write or create that day; he just wanted to go to the beach. He's always been the type of writer to write only when he felt something (as most of us are). That one day he decided to push through and write a new song instead of going to the beach (which was very close to the studio he was at) and he came up with the band's biggest hit to date. In fact, the eerie demo version he created at the studio was the same version to be released to radio by the label. I bet he's glad he decided to write that day instead of going to the beach! Now, just think about what you could create by sticking it out...or think about what you could be missing out on by not creating because of a mood. Is it really worth it? You could write the most successful piece of your career when you're not in the mood to write.
While writing may seem like a mood, it doesn't have to be. Writing should be a part of life for us even if it only means writing one sentence a day. We should never stop creating and we should always remember that writing is who we are...not a feeling!
If you don't know the song "Pumped Up Kicks", take a listen below!
"Thank you, have a good day!" That's the line I have to say over and over again, countless times a day. It's a line I feared since I was small because I've always believed that I would have more. I always believed that I would do better.
Now I'm not knocking what anyone else does for a living but I am saying that for me, personally, it's not where I long to be. I graduated from college a year ago with honors and I thought I would be somewhere by now. Does this sound familiar to anyone?
Just the other day while I was in deep thought (this is how I spend 90% of my day), I hear my mind scream to myself, "I have all these dreams and I have no idea what to do with them!" Then, that's when I wondered how many other people must feel the same. While at work the other day, I took a look at everyone around me and wondered what their dreams once was and if they're actually living it. I began to feel sad for humanity thinking about how most of us settle for less when we deserve much more.
How many of us had dreams and goals but we never knew where to start so those dreams fizzled away or hid somewhere underneath? I know that I can't be the only one to feel this way. Think about all the other recent grads and even middle aged people who still have strong desires that are burning inside of them but everyday it gets dimmed by reality.
I don't plan on giving up and neither should you (whoever you are!). Our goals were set for a reason and although most of us aren't sure what that reason is, we're still hellbent on figuring it out. A life without me living my dream just doesn't make sense to me. After all of my hard work and the challenges I've been through, where I am currently at in my life doesn't make sense. I learned this to be true for a lot of people.
I followed the recipe for success since I was 4 years old and I know I'm not entitled to anything but I can't help but feel there must have been an error in the equation somewhere. Not bragging, but I am more knowledgeable than a lot of people I know, I'm savvy in almost every area, and I'm a hard worker. I'm creative and I'm always willing to go the extra mile just to reach a goal. I'm sure that explains a lot of you out there and this is why we deserve to cross the finish line of our dreams. We deserve more than a pat on the back or a simple 9-5 job that gets more redundant every day.
We have dreams and we have to figure out what to do with them!
It's great when you feel like your work is being appreciated. Big thanks to everyone who purchased or read A Tragic Heart. I'm grateful for all of the positive reviews and feedback. I'm hoping to give you all the same enjoyment with RED. I've shared some of the reviews below (I even got my first international review from the UK).
"It's the little things and the joy they bring..."
I finished my fourth novel, Turn It Off a couple of days ago (it's the third and final installment in the "Tragic" series) and now I realized I have nothing to do until I decide to start my fifth. I'm trying to wait it out so I can start with a fresh mind and let go of the characters I learned to love so much (and who were very real to me) and that's when I realized how much something so small like completing a project can mean.
My first novel, A Tragic Heart has been receiving great reviews from readers and truthfully, I can't remember the last time I felt so...whole (probably in Australia back in November/December). The recent reviews I received confirmed just how much I want to continue with the writing thing. My entire life I always wanted to be a part of entertainment and the positive feedback I've been receiving from people only makes me want this more. A little thing like a simple review on Amazon or Goodreads meant the world to me. It caused me to think that maybe the little things aren't so little after all.
As I'm preparing to release RED (part 2 of A Tragic Heart), I keep thinking about if people will like it or not. Of course not everyone will give you a positive review but after the reviews from A Tragic Heart, I feel the pressure to push out the same quality for RED.
Little things make a big difference. Three new reviews helped me realize that I have to stay on top of things and showed me how much I don't want to disappoint any of my readers. People are now depending on me for a good story and that's what I want to give them 100% of the time.
Most people see writing a novel as a big deal and freak out when I say I've written four and about to start on my fifth. It never seems like a big deal to me. I always assume it's because I'm so young (only 22), but now that I think about it, it may actually be a big deal. It took a few reviews for me to get that.
I guess the point of this post is to remind everyone that the little things are the things that truly matter in life. Most of us forget that and don't appreciate whatever is around us enough. A good review can change the course of your day and leave you feeling euphoric. Someone telling you you look nice today can leave you feeling confident. It's a small compliment but it does make a difference, doesn't it?
So, as you all go on about your day whether it's bad or good, try to appreciate the little things through it all...listening to the song below may help also!
"We can't be judged. We can't be told we're not good enough because of our past. After all, we're all red on the inside."-RED (Part II of A Tragic Heart)
So, a few people have been asking me about my next novel and I am happy to say that it will be coming out soon (I am shooting for this Fall!). I may have found an editor for the novel and I recently designed the cover for it (it is subject to change but more than likely it won't). RED, is a continuation of A Tragic Heart, and for those of you who read the latter should already have an idea whose story it is (I don't want to spoil it for the rest of them). While A Tragic Heart was a bit more intense, RED still tackles major issues and deals with the feeling of being "unwanted" or a "mistake". Sometimes it's hard to define who we are when the world sees us as something else and that is what the main character in RED is dealing with. Just like A Tragic Heart, there are many themes to the novel and can be enjoyable for anyone, although it is also a Young Adult novel. RED is a bit more raw and wild than the previous novel, so you have been warned (it isn't too bad though...I think). Hey! We all gotta take chances sometime!
Here is a poem that I written a while ago (probably in 2010). I know I was only 18 when I wrote it. It's written in permanent marker on my bedroom wall (along with many song lyrics and quotes). It's called "Too Far Gone" and at the time I considered it one of the best pieces I've ever written. It's about how people tend to judge our actions but never ask why we reacted the way we did. I always felt like that was one of the most unfair aspects of life. We all have a story and we all are the way we are for a reason. No one decides to wake up in a bad mood and no one turns out the way they are simply because they felt like it. There's more to everyone and I think that people should always remain mindful of that. Basically, it's for anyone who has ever felt misunderstood (which is everyone).