S. Elle Cameron

All love is a tragedy...

Filtering by Tag: 31 Poems for 31 Days

Yesterday or Tomorrow (OctPoWriMo2015-Day 14)

Stuck in the middle
Not sure where to go
Life can be fickle 
Not sure what to know

Because truth is always blurred
It's never black and white
My words are kind of slurred
I'm stuck in the middle tonight

Drunk in the middle of a bridge
That connects yesterday and tomorrow
I missed it by a smidge
But I don't want to go back to sorrow

So if I'm in between
Yesterday and tomorrow
Is today unseen? 
Some logic I could borrow

Because I'm not sure where I stand
Or what all of this means
It's like my feet are caught in quick sand
The distance is equal, or so it seems

Yesterday or tomorrow? 

Welcome To Adulthood (OctPoWriMo2015-Day 12)

Am I crazy for thinking there's more?
Because I feel like this can't be all
Could I find it if I knew what to look for?
Don't say there's nothing behind this wall

Everything contains something deeper
Fear would love to prove that theory wrong
Going the other route because it's cheaper
Hoping what I need won't pass me along

Impossible things happen all the time
"Just believe," they all say
Kinder things have happened to evil souls
Let's not talk about that today

My mind is a wandering battle
Never ending at any point
Over bearing and keeps me rattled
Promising my dreams and fears are joint

Quiet moments do me no good
Rationalization is my worst enemy
Sometimes I don't think as I should
Trying to find a permanent remedy

Understanding is the hardest
Volunteering my sanity
Wishing on stardust
Xanax helps my inhumanity 

Yelling my loudest won't do me any good
Zookeepers stand by to lock up this animal inside 

The prompt today was to create a poem with 26 lines using different letters of the alphabet. I decided to go in alphabetical order.

Untamed Heart (OctPoWriMo2015-Day 10)

Ink me good
Or bad if you choose
I have an untamed heart
That will never lose

Don't go by guidelines
I don't believe in rules
I'm an untamed heart
I see from a different view

Don't want what you want
Don't care what you say
My heart is untamed
It'll always be this way

You tell me to grow up
But rebellion isn't a phase
My heart's not tamed
I was born a renegade

This is who I am
It's in my blood
My heart can't be tamed
That's how it always was 

There's Fire In You... (OctPoWriMo2015-Day 9)

Sparks fly
I let them ignite
Firestorms were always my favorite
Water dries
And you can't see the wind
And sometimes the earth cracks beneath your feet
But fire burns
And it spreads throughout the night
Destroying anything that gets in it's way
It doesn't stop at any cost
I always admired that

Fire is everywhere
In your eyes
Your gut
Your heart
Birthed from nothing but just a tiny spark
Now it's a four alarm fire
And it can't be stopped
There's no running
No hiding

Just spread your arms and embrace it
To the millionth degree...

The prompt for today was the elements. 

Color Me Black (OctPoWriMo2015-Day 8)

Black is what I always was
So I decided to embrace it
Heartache, mystery and sophisticastion
They all can sum me up
Just a little bit
But I know what color I am, it's a perfect fit

I'm the color people stay away from
They can't read me
To them, I'm a loaded gun
But I'm not here to talk about weapons
Because the words I write are plenty
24 years and they still don't get me

They think this means I'm dark on the inside
Yet this may be true
But there's still a light that shines
Because black doesn't mean I'm bad
Just that I'm a mystery
I think that's what gets them mad

My shade is too dark to see through
And they're afraid of what they can't see
So they try to mold me
But I was never one for conformity
So color me bad or color me good
It doesn't matter, I'll still be misunderstood

The prompt was "Color Me Good" and to write about a color that sparks a memory or a feeling. I've always been black which is associated with mystery and sophistication. By the way, I do remember the 90's group Color Me Bad (as was referenced in the prompt). http://www.octpowrimo.com/

Some Things You Can't Tell (OctPoWriMo2015-Day 7)

They said to stay away
You'll be no good for each other
Neither of us listened that day
Now we wouldn't choose another 

They listed the reasons why
Aired out your dirty laundry
But I didn't bat an eye
That's when they came after me

But you kept still and stayed
And that made me smile
We stopped caring what they say
5 years...I think we lasted a while

Much longer than they thought
Turns out we fit well
They never found the heartache that they sought
I guess some things you just can't tell...

The prompt for today was the road less traveled. We had to think of a time we didn't listen to popular opinion and ended up thankful we didn't. 

Not Enough (OctPoWriMo2015-Day 5)

Screaming and fighting isn't enough to keep me away from you
Crying and hard feelings aren't strong enough to stop this feeling
Because it's always you I run to, no matter what you do
As much as I hate you, there's always a feeling of love I'm concealing

Heartbreak and discomfort doesn't stop our world from going round
Painful words and blows won't kill our moments
Because I hear so much even when you don't make a sound
When you're too angry to speak, you're never my opponent

Because this is what true love looks like
Even during the worst times
We fight

For us, for who we want to be, for who we are together...

The prompt was based off of a line from Taylor's Swift's song "You Are In Love". It's actually my favorite part of the song and I would always play it over and over which is why I found it funny to be the prompt for day 5. 

"You understand now why they lost their minds and fought the wars
And why I've spent my whole life trying to put it into words"-Taylor Swift

It Was All A Dream (OctPoWriMo2015-Day 4)

I was there and so were you
We had it all and no one had to approve
I owned my life and you owned yours
It was magical and we were our own cure

Everything was where it belonged
I was happy and you came along
Not a thing was out of place
We owned it all, our time and space

But things are rarely what they seem
It was time to wake up, it was all a dream
I long for a world where that feeling can be real
But that dream hit me hard, I need time to heal

There needs to be a world with simple joy and magic
There's something in my gut telling me I have to have it
Because if I don't it can be the death of me
Because if I don't, all I'll ever have is a dream

Waiting...(OctPoWriMo2015-Day 3)

I'm sitting here waiting
Just waiting for something to happen
I showed up, I fought my way here
Did the opportunity disappear?
Did I blink and miss it?
I thought this was it, the perfect fit

"Showing up is half the battle"
That's what they always say
Show up and get on the saddle
Ride it for what it's worth
But it ain't much here
It's not much there...

I thought waiting may not be enough
But they say waiting makes you tough
It gives you thicker skin
But I learned it's not about the outside but what's within
And even sometimes that ain't enough
Because we have no say over this kind of stuff

Where we'll end up
Who we are
We can try to change it but there's no guarantee
No matter what happens there's always a fee
So go ahead, we can dream and dream
But some dreams will always be incomplete


There's Something In The Clouds Tonight... (OctPoWriMo2015-Day 1)

The sky is dark
But the night is light
There's something in the clouds tonight
Can't tell what it is
Or what I want out of life
But there's something in the clouds tonight
That makes me think I can be more
It makes me dream 'til my mind is sore
But I can't see past my initial sight
Still, there's something in the clouds tonight
The wind is getting icy
And the air is colder, dear
Sometimes I wish my ambitions would disappear
For some reason, this evening I want them to stay
Maybe I can keep them into the next day
I hope it's not gone before the morning light
Because I like whatever it is in the clouds tonight

The Day Before (OctPoWriMo2014)-Day 30

It was the day before and only if I'd known
That it was the day before my disaster
How funny it is when everything seems normal
Then all of a sudden your whole life changes
We're never really prepared for the day that alters us
That way, we can't hold our breath
Or stand our ground
But it was the day before
And God! It it took me down!

There was fire and brimstone
And coal and smoke
I tried to hold my nose but it wasn't enough
This day was written in my destiny 
To make me who I am
And I wouldn't take it back
Because I would forfeit it all
It was the day before
And I wasn't ready for that fall!

But goodness gracious I'm glad that I tumbled
Because here I am to tell about it
And I can say it all was worth it
I needed to fall
I needed to stumble 
Disaster saved my life
And I am still here because of that moment
Thanks to the day before
For being my worst component


This Love (OctPoWriMo2014)-Day 29

I'm definitely unsure
You're positively immature
And I don't see how this is going to mix
Plus, there's not much we can fix
You're a red light and I'm passing go
I'm a free flight and you're...I don't know
But somehow this love is real
When it probably should be sealed
We're dysfunctional 
Yet untouchable
But we wouldn't give it up for the world
I'll choose you as my guy...me your girl
But this can't be good for our health
But what do I do when you're worth my wealth?
Maybe that means I don't have much
But I still love the feel of your touch
This love sometimes may suck
But this love is us


Starving Hunger (OctPoWriMo2014)-Day 28

I got drunk off failure
Hungover by life
But after coming face to face with porcelain
My stomach's clear
And I'm hungry for more
Life has handed me dirty cards
But I wiped them clean to start over
My gut is growling for triumph
My heart is beating for success
It's time for me to get out of this mess
I'm hungry for victory
I'm hungry for happiness
I'm hungry for life

Beta Waves (OctPoWriMo2014)-Day 27

Closing my eyes is my favorite thing to do
It's not that I'm lazy but I get to dream about you
If only I could still hold you near
This pain in my heart would disappear
You're only present in my wildest dreams
We're alive in a world where nothing is what it seems

I never knew that sleep could be so satisfying
The peace, the freedom is almost like I'm dying
But it happens in the best way that could exist
Because I get to see the one that I miss
Every night I get to smile
I get the chance to talk to you for a while

In reality, you're not even here with me
But that doesn't matter in my dreams
That's why being asleep is better than being awake
Touching things only my beta waves can create
I don't care if I only love a fantasy
I don't care if it contributes to my abnormality 

Because I'm happy that you're right in front of me
Even if I'm the only one who can see
I'm okay with living in a lie
As long as we never have to say goodbye
I can't let you go ever again
I don't think this heart would ever mend

70VE (OctPoWriMo2014)-Day 26

I stare at the long dark hallway
Hoping a light will show up
I swallow hard
Clench my fists
And feel the sweat form on my face
One step after another I slowly go
For a second I close my eyes tightly 
Hoping this is the right choice
I try to be mindful of my surroundings 
But there's nothing to see
I'm all alone
With goosebumps on my skin
I'm more than halfway there
But I want to turn around
What's waiting for me?
I see a light just at the end
I stop before I step into the brightness
What if it's not there?
Take a deep breath...exhale
I walk into the light
A smile spreads across my face
Love was waiting for me all along

Ink (OctPoWriMo2014)-Day 24

Wipe it clean
Put the needle to my skin
Ink it exactly how I want it
It started with one
Then two and three
Before I knew it I hit number four
Now I'm contemplating what's next
What do I want for number five
Let's make this fun
Make it something memorable
New Ink for a different place
Travel the world and make it permanent
 Every memory sticks to my skin forever
They all tell a story
They all have a meaning
Favorite band, biggest dreams, aspirations
It keeps me grounded
Keeps my head straight
Ink is my guilty pleasure 

Cement (OctPoWriMo2014)-Day 23

What's next?
Where do I go from here?
Now that it's over
Where should I appear?
I feel like I have no place
All this time and not enough space
That part of my journey is over
I passed the test
But what do I do with all the rest?
Life doesn't give you instructons
No manual or handbook
But I need to know where I should look
Because now I feel lost
In the middle of nowhere
I'm not even sure if I should even care
I took the risks
Came out on top
So why am I here at the bottom of the rock?
So many familiar faces
Lets me know that I don't belong here
I did what I was supposed to do
So why am I not up there?
It wasn't enough and no one ever told me
And now I'm stuck, not where I should be
Cemented into failure
Like it's my new name
Hard work is optional
It's all about the game
Who knows who
Who came from where
I guess that's the reason why I'm not up there
Years of doing the very right thing
Showed me the pain life can bring
So put my face in wet cement
I'll hold my breath and let it dry
Let it freeze the tears that I cry
Because I'm ready to move onto something more
What should I do?
I'm really not sure
So I'll lie in here in cement
Give me a while
I'll tell you how it went 


Push Play (OctPoWriMo2014)-Day 22

Push play
Ready, set, go
I'm not really ready
But how else will I know? 
My mind is set
Got to keep the race steady
Have to take what I can get
Because no one will let me

Fast foward
To show me that this is worth it all
Give me something to hold on to
When I stumble and fall
Because there are no rewinds
No places for do overs
Even if I'm not ready, this is my time